CELEBRITY DOPE: Hugh Grant cracks gay jokes at rugby match

Hugh Grant has forced the BBC to apologize after he offended some gay viewers by commenting during a rugby match on his high school playing days.

“I discovered it hurt less if you tackled hard than if you tackled like a queen,” he said during a match broadcast at Twickenham.

Off camera, Grant is believed to have added: “Yes, and I’m not an effete Brit girly boy who sometimes secretly questions his own sexuality and overcompensates by boffing models and hookers. I’m tough, and mean! Yeaargghh! I like rugby! Rowrrr!”


Best line from last night’s Roast of Donald Trump, on the Comedy Network? Without a doubt, Snoop Dogg. “Trump is looking at running for president, I figure why not: wouldn’t be the first time he pushed a black family out of their home.”


Also from the world of hip-hop, rapper Nas has aired his sympathy for Libyan dictator Moammar Gadhafi, calling him “misunderstood.”

Gadhafi, whose own supporters recently confided the dictator personally masterminded the bombing of the Pan-Am flight over Lockerbie, Scotland, is currently trying to repress a pro-democracy civil rebellion via methods his own U.N. Emissary described as “genocide.”

Still, says Nas, the rapper “never saw Gadhafi as an enemy, like a deadly enemy that wanted to harm people for no reason.”

This, from the genius who called Jesse Jackson, a man who marched with Martin Luther King, a “has-been “player hater” and mocked civil rights marches.

With respect for his elders and betters like that….well, his Gadhafi gaffe is just doubly shocking!


Meanwhile, speaking of “Mars Needs Moms,” Disney has cancelled director Robert Zemeckis’ planned follow-up with the studio, “Yellow Submarine.”

There’s no punchline there, they were actually thinking of making an animated remake of “Yellow Submarine,” a movie that only existed in the first place due to the Beatles’ music, pop artist Peter Max and way too much acid.(His pic to the right is called “Cosmic Juniper,” by the way.)

It’s almost like a dumb decision just cost them a bunch of money, or something, and now they’re leery.


American Pie actor Jason Biggs has complained publicly that he finds his wife’s stripper pole, which she installed in their living room for exercise, to be unnecessarily distracting. “Every guy I told, they were like, ‘That’s the coolest thing ever,’ and I’m like, ‘Not when it’s in the middle of your living room… I tell you when a stripper pole is cool – at a strip club when some other girl, not your wife, is dancing on it.

Biggs’ gorgeous wife had no comment. But we wouldn’t be surprised if she baked him a pie.


Selena Gomez, the maybe-maybe not 18-year-old girlfriend of Justin Bieber has told her legion of Twitter followers that sometimes, when you have a crush, it, like, really hurts, like when she had her crush on Jesse McCartney, who is soooo dreamy, and like…. like then you so totally realize what it was like when that boy had a crush on you and he…….

Ah hell, all of these people still have at least four years of cognitive development ahead of them. I refuse the pretence of interest.