THE DAILY FUNNY: Art for pity’s sake

* You think you have problems? You could try hanging around this joint for awhile. If your composition is bad, you’ll never hear the end of it. And don’t get us started on the lines. The Onion reports on a work of art that hit a wall when it came to positive reinforcement.

* Stately Wayne Manor is the kind of swinging bachelor pad you’d think would make picking up chicks really easy. I mean, damn! This place’s Grotto makes Hef’s mansion look like a Super 8. But what if the guy who owned it were a super-serious superhero type, and had never really had the time to hone his ….uh…skills with the ladies.

* Meanwhile, Pittsburgh-based writer Peter McKay proves the sensation of being ripped off by a mechanic because we don’t know if he’s telling the truth is universal. Gee, thanks for that, Pete.

* Wonder why the prospect of voting in the upcoming election seems so bleak? Look no further than the Netherlands.

No. Wait. That’s not right. That’s pot.

No, you need to look to that other nether land, the U.S. Of A, where writer Andy Borowitz reports on why there’s an electoral trade imbalance behind voter malaise.

* Speaking of malaise….no, wait….speaking of malice, here’s our favourite British cynic Charlie Brooker, demonstrating why, exactly, teenagers suck: because they’ve yet to understand that a sarcastic invective takes IMAGINATION. On the same subject, Funny or Die chimes in.

* Finally caught up from those Christmas bills? The good people at figure it’s time for you to go pick up one of those nifty Xbox Kinect peripherals….you know, the ones people have already hacked to use with computers? Hey, be careful what you wish for, soon-to-be-exctinct guy.

* On the off chance you survived that last one, offers a rousing roundup of ways in which you can say you’re sorry for just about anything – including helpful email and phone contacts for when specific asses must be kissed.