GIGGLE CITY: Jeremy Hotz keeps it short and sweet

GigCity Edmonton Jeremy HotzWhen we started the unfortunately named Giggle City feature – asking the same set of dumb questions and expecting smart answers from any stand-up comedian who happened to be in range – we were hoping for a detailed, in-depth exploration of the modern comic mind. Sure, we learned a lot, like how female hecklers are the worst, how there really is such a thing as “too soon,” and the proper use of the “triple.” But man, while unexamined life might not be worth living, over-examined comedy can make you want to kill yourself. You know what they say: Brevity, soul of wit.

So thank you, Jeremy Hotz. Performing at the Winspear Centre on Sunday, March 17, the South African-born Canadian comic either seemed to misunderstand the concept behind the questionnaire, or something was lost in translation in doing it by email instead of the usual ordeal by telephone interview. Either way, this is as deep as it gets, or ever needs to be:

Q: If you could be any celebrity (other than yourself), who would it be and why?

A: Dolly Parton. Why? Isn’t it obvious?

Q: What is your best/worst heckler experience?

A: Guy yells “Hey look!” and has hooks for hands. I ask him if it comes in handy when he’s eating lobster.

Q: What’s the difference between kids today and when you were a kid?

A: The major difference is kids today weren’t born when I was a kid.

Q: What’s the worst meal you ever had on the road?

A: I once consumed a Marmite sandwich and a Fresca in Cape Breton.

Q: Do you have an old bit you were sad to let go?

A: The mighty Hercules had the strength of 10 ordinary men. How come 11 guys never got together and beat the sh*t out of him?

Q: What is a very little thing that makes you mad?

A: The four hour fire log only burns for three hours and fifty six minutes and nobody’s doing a damn thing about it!

Q: What is a big thing that angers you?

A: A 500 pound woman wearing stilettos.

Q: Where is the “line” that you will or will not cross in your act?

A: The edge of the stage.

Q: Do you think you have to be a pessimist to be an effective comedian?

A: Like this answer is going to lead to anything.